Amazon, the 800# gorilla lurking in every aspiring author’s living room, has just released news of a “machine learning platform” “to make customer reviews more meaningful”, which in plain English means who the heck knows.

Just like SkyNet, apparently Amazon is becoming self-aware and will be monitoring and changing reviews over time. Only time will tell if this is a good thing or a bad thing for authors especially those who write about erotic themes.

On one hand, if someone writes some filth that sucks (and I mean sucks in a bad way) and gets his/her friends to give it a 5-star rating then SkyNet will down rate the reviews and give it a more honest 1-star if it discovers that the story really blows.

The question in my mind is does the program actually read the story and count up the questionable use of “slut” or “enormous penis” to arrive at it’s own rating? Then using its own rating system to change ratings by others to reflect the machine’s thoughts of the story?

What if Amazon’s “machine learning platform” doesn’t like getting an anal probe or discovering that water sports causes its CPU to short out? Would this mean that your masturbatory masterpiece gets a rim job from a weed whacker instead of the Swedish flight attendants, who live next door, offering to come over and polish your knob, while you finish your latest work, “Butt sex for dummies.”

Just as Hippies had “The Man” and “1984”, erotic writers of today have to thread a thin line when writing descriptions of their latest filth and hope to not offend the Man (i.e. Amazon). When someone buys an erotic story, don’t we owe it to the reader to let him/her know exactly what they are getting when they plunk down their hard earned money?

Does the story say “they had sex” or does the story explain in explicit and juicy detail of what happened? When you have your Hitachi on high and your toes are gripped so tight on the foot of the bed that you’re leaving claw markets, this is no time to have to fill in the blanks about what is happening.

Thinking is never a good thing when you’re having a threesome with your left and right hands, a good story leads you by the hand (if you have a free one) and allows you to fully enjoy every explicit detail right up to the explosive climax.

Now as most of my followers know, I write porn that is designed to be read with one hand but somehow I have to explain that in the story’s description but not push the boundaries to the point that it is rated “Adult”, which is the kiss of death for stories published on Amazon.

I like to write erotica that has a good plot, lots of juicy sex, few misspelled words, and decent grammar that is always HEA (Happily Ever After).

If you are interested in one of the stories about Amazon’s machine rating system, click here.