I started writing porn a little over five years ago and one of the things every smut writer needs is something to fondle and hold dear, in other words, a laptop. As an engineer and self-professed geek, electronics is something that I live for. Well other than a nice pair of legs but that’s something completely different.
Before my writing gig, I’d owned a series of laptops but most of you might remember that it was sort of like putting a handle on your home computer.
My wife and I are swingers and have been for some time, so don’t be surprised if your wife throws the house keys in the bowl at the entryway. One of the first things you learn is that the Lifestyle is a voyeur’s orgasmic delight.
A big percentage of the women are exhibitionists and never miss an opportunity to see how few clothes they can wear and avoid being arrested before they get into the house. My wife says that she loves to show off and wearing a cute LBD which barely covers her butt. The good thing about a house party is that it’s a safe environment for women and so they can show off and flirt without worrying about being called a slut, well except in a good way.
So, as you can imagine the sights at a party are far beyond anything most “straights” every experience. But it’s not something that you can talk about around the water cooler at work. So one evening I found Literotica on the Internet, which is a sight that amateurs write erotica and post it for others to read.
That got me to thinking, I bet I could do this and could use storytelling as a vehicle to talk about things we’ve seen and done. With our lifestyle and work, time is a precious commodity at my house and it immediately hit me, “I need a new laptop to write smut on.”
I started with an Asus netbook, which I purchased a month before the iPad came out (there will be a common theme here). I really liked it and it worked pretty well. The keyboard was about 92% of a normal keyboard and had like a 10-hour battery life. It ran Windows and I used it to pump out my first couple of stories.
Then flushed with success, or maybe it was the third cup of coffee, I wanted more. Like a phone book, I let my fingers do the walking and purchased one the “new” ultra laptops. At three pounds it was sweet, nice touchscreen, fast, but with a five-hour battery.
It was like the first time your wife wants to try a butt plug on you, it sounds like fun at first but ends up being a pain in the ass. I found that I was like someone with an iPhone, walking around like a zombie looking for a power outlet to charge my device with.
You know you’ve made a mistake when your battery dies about the time they push back from the gate. I realized that I was hooked on juice, AC juice that is.
I’ve always been a Windows person and kidded all of the Mac users as having drunk the kool-aid but I was desperate and stumbled upon the MacBook Air. The basic design was released in 2008 and after CPU upgrades were still plugging along.
I purchased a 2012 version (back in 2012) and fell in love, it was everything I desired except for the boobs and legs, but then again I had Wifey for those. Battery life was twice my Windows machine and the keyboard was to die for. The Mac Air keyboard is almost sexual to use and the words just flow out.
Now I was in hog heaven, as we say back home. My three-pound Air went everywhere with me except to parties but I’d leave her in the car just in case. For some reason, I discovered that I’m most productive in a fast food restaurant or Starbucks with my laptop. Maybe it’s because they don’t let you have your pants around your ankles at Burger King.
But what I learned is that we often have a lot of downtimes, typically 15-30 minutes at a time and with my MBA, I could whip it out and pound it for a few minutes, no matter where I was.
Then I became seduced by the latest generation of Ultra touch laptops and jumped ship about this time last year. My new laptop had more of everything than my poor aging Mac. To appease my conscience for buying yet another computer, I gifted it to my lovely wife.
But buyer’s remorse quickly set in when I discovered that the touchpad sucks. It seemed to be possessed and would do things by itself, like delete a paragraph that I had painstakingly typed or open some link I was just passing by and never clicked on.
HP replaced the touchpad after assuring me they knew the problem and they lied. The new touchpad was just as bad. You go to the owner’s forums and others are complaining about the same problems yet when you called technical support they were always surprised and no one else was having this issue.
My sweet wife was willing to give me my old Air back but I could see a love affair developing there and didn’t want to do that.
For months, I’ve followed the various Apple forums looking for any tidbit of new information about a new generation Air. Then I resigned myself to the fact that Apple wanted me to buy a $4,000 MacBook Pro with a new style keyboard everyone was griping about. My old Air did everything I wanted for less than half the money of a fully loaded MacBook Pro.
About a week ago, Foxy asked me to show her how to do something on her Air. As soon as my fingers touched the keyboard, I was in love once again. Running your fingers around the keyboard is like playing with a nice set of jugs and I just had to have one.
So I bought a new MacBook Air with a CPU that’s three generations behind the latest but I’ve got my keyboard back. So I spent most of yesterday loading software and doing my part to raise the bottom line of software vendors.
Then this morning I read a rumor that Apple is going to bring out an updated version of the Air, WTF? I guess they were just waiting for me to buy something so that they could release the next version.
But still, I’m back in love for now. I realize that I’m fickle but like a junkie looking forward to my next fix.
HALF PRICE SALE March 4-10, 2018
Remember that all of my erotic stories are on sale the week of March 4th to 10th, 2018.
You must not be living right, Larry. As a writer and computer systems engineer myself, I was never seen without my case that carried three laptops – the two I used for work and my personal one and even though they were all Windows-based, I never ran out of juice… then again, I made sure all of my laptops had higher capacity batteries installed.
I’ve heard people rant and rave about Macs but I could never justify the cost, not when I could get a good Windows machine for half the price of a Mac. And given what you wrote, yeah, Apple had to see you coming and waited for you to buy a new Mac before announcing they were coming out with something better…
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I take a laptop to work as I don’t want to share my stories or other musings with our IT department. They would probably be less than amused. I’ve got a hotspot through my cell phone provider that gives my 5gb/month of data. This way I’m completely isolated from the company network.
My HP Spectre x360 is nice and the battery lasts all day but the freaking touchpad drives me crazy. It’s got an i7, 16gb ram but I really don’t need that to write. My new Mac is basically the same as I passed down to my wife except mine has 8gb ram versus 4gb.
If you ever try typing on an Air, you’ll be hooked. If I touch the sides of the HP touchpad with my palms, the cursor will jump half a page. Then I look down and realize that I’m inserting text into another paragraph by mistake. This never happens on the Mac.
I always joked about people and their Mac’s but have become a believer myself.
I’ve never been a fan of touchpads and especially those that manages to find their way under my kinda large hands… which is why I always carried a couple of mice with me – one wired, one wireless (and it’s charger) because touchpads are either too responsive or not responsive enough to keep up with how fast I can type.
I’d probably not be hooked on an Air… because I couldn’t afford to buy one, that and since I’m retired, I don’t need to drag my laptop around with me – that’s why Apple made iPads.
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I agree with you on touchpads and have Bluetooth mice that I could carry around but I don’t like to have to deal with something else when I’m at StarBucks or visiting Jack. But it pisses me off that Windows hardware people like HP, Asus, Dell can’t make a touchpad which works and Apple seems to have little problems doing it.
Now the day after I received my MacBook after giving up on a newer version, I read in the news that Apple is going to release a cheaper updated Air (rumor) and now I’m using an Air that is 3 generations back in CPU design. Certainly, speed is not an issue for what I do but the new Skylake CPUs are so much easier on the battery that I could expect 16-18 hours of use instead of 12. Sometimes I wonder if they were just waiting around to get me to buy something before releasing a new model.
I enjoyed reading your post about laptops. Especially since it convinced me I’d made the right decision to transition from lugging a laptop around to using Samsung’s Tablets in conjunction with my phone.
I own two an 8 inch and a 9.7 inch – i lile the 8 inch better because its easier to hold while writing than the bigger tablet.
The only reason i would need a computer is if i decided to try publishing again. In that case i much prefer using the Word Perfect word processor software and will most likely purchase a three in one desktop.
Is there a brand out there that you would recommend that i check out?
Thanks you! 🙂
I think the big decision is to either go with an iPad or some type of Android tablet. Once you’re past that decision, then check the version operating system they are running. A name brand such as Samsung is more likely to have system upgrades than a no-name version but other than that pick build quality.
If you’re going to write on a tablet, by all means, get a keyboard for it as typing on the screen is slow if you are a touch typist. But you can buy an inexpensive laptop for about the same price as a tablet. Certainly, it will not have the battery life of a tablet but much easier to type on. Using a laptop will allow you to run full versions of the word processing package.
Also be honest with yourself on how you are going to use it. If you are just going to write, email, and browse the Internet all those bells and whistles are just costing you money. I basically look at two things battery life and the keyboard/touchpad. My Air gives me 10-12 hours of use before needing a charge. My two ultra-books running Windows 10 will give me about 6 hours and less with a lot of Internet access. My two Windows touchpads are poor and poorer while my MBA is as good as the full size Logitech on my desktops.