One of the things you quickly discover when you start swinging is that you develop two sets of friends, the straight ones and the party ones. I know that you think you are smart enough to keep them separate but trust me, two identical little black books for two different kinds of people.

In the Lifestyle, you are always meeting people especially if you attend a lot of house parties. In many cases it’s evident that they are perverts from the names in the book. Swingers typically only refer to others by first names and so when you see Tom and Mary, instead of Tom and Mary Brown, you can be pretty sure that they party.

But after a while, it can get confusing and you don’t want to accidentally invite your next door neighbors to your wife’s first gangbang.

Speaking of neighbors, always try and keep your distance unless they are in the Lifestyle also. We have large New Year’s Eve Pajama Parties and a couple we became friends with lived down the street.

One New Year’s around 1 AM the doorbell rings and like an idiot I answer it.  Opening the door, I find my neighbors all dressed up and coming home from their party. Seeing all the cars, they decide to crash the party. Not knowing what to do, I invited them in.

Standing in the foyer with an orgy in the living room and half the people buck naked, it was an eye opener for two straight people. Putting this in perspective by imagining 50 couples at the party.

Wifey shows up to help me deal with them and she’s wearing Snoopy long johns, unbuttoned all the way down the front but at least the flap was buttoned up.

I think it became pretty evident why we never invited them to New Years and they quickly left except I got the distinct impression that his wife wanted to stay. After that it reinforced my decision to keep my neighbors out of our business.